My Mom

I feel so new to this, naive even. I can't tell how many times I tried to write down in words how I feel, how I've felt. Just on Sunday, we were at Church and someone handed me a piece of paper to write down something about my mother for an upcoming lesson. I sat racking my brain for something to write about my mother and yet I wrote nothing. Later on that night I would learn that my Mother passed away.

And now I need to write something.

My Mom was diagnosed with Scleroderma 19 years ago in June, I was 7. Everything changed, not all at first (at least for me) but eventually we all worked our way through that crippling disease. Her life, our lives, were a steady stream of bad news which we somehow turned into good. An original diagnosis of 5-7 years, turned to 7-10, turned to defying odds. That's how stubborn my Mom was, she fought to see graduations, missionaries return, weddings, and babies being born. She defied odds.

These past few years my sisters' and I have spent our days off during the week taking care of my Mom. I've had several people tell me "Oh, I couldn't do that..." or "How do you do that?" day after day. And I can tell them that I have grown up in the most charitable and giving family that I don't know any different. My Mom who was in extreme amounts of pain on most days, would be the first to ask me how I was feeling before I could even ask her.

My mom was a talented lady and I remembered being so excited when she was making a dress or costume for someone. I would sit beside her and scrounge together all of the scraps of fabric and save them for projects. She even helped me sew curtains for a playhouse that we had in our backyard. Two years ago, starting in October she decided she was going to make blankets for Christmas for all 7 of the married couples in the family. Not only did finish in time, she made one more for my Dad. The next year she made 15 blankets for each of the grandkids, plus other things over the years such as blessing outfits and blankets. I drove her several times to Michael's and enjoy helping her choose colors and patterns.

In all selfishness, I hate that she's gone but I guess it's NO COINCIDENCE that I wrote earlier on Sunday how grateful I am for the Atonement in my life. I have a strong testimony of the Gospel of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints.

And hey, I like knowing she's in Heaven out of pain, with her Dad and future Grandkids, doing cartwheels and standing in line for the buffet.

I love you Mom.